Summer of Rock Hard Abs!

Shortly after I learned I would not be pregnant this summer, I thought about all the things I could now do that I couldn't when I was briefly with child. The first thing I did - smoke a cigarette. I quit years ago when I found out I was pregnant with Charlie, and there are a lot of things I hate about smoking, like the fact it could kill me. And it makes my hair smell like a sticky-floored bar. But the best way to feel like you're doing something bad and getting away with it - smoke a cigarette. So I did. With a Venti Misto - all caff - from Starbucks. THEN I took a vicodin. Cuz I'm not much of a drinker.

It was a nice evening, in spite of learning that I was carrying around a dead fetus inside of me just hours prior. Sorry - it's crass but that's exactly what my mind was replaying in my head on constant repeat until I had the d&c. It's gross.

So anyway, I decided that I didn't want to continue with these only-when-not-pregnant activities because a) smoking in front of your 2 year old kills the fun of it - and, again, will kill me as well, eventually leaving Charlie motherless and devestated and alone, b) Venti anything makes me pee all day, c) vicodin gets in the way of, well, living. And pooping. It constipates you, you know.

So my next challenge was this: what could I do this summer that I couldn't do if I was pregnant AND that was good for me?

This led to a natural conclusion: The Summer of Rock Hard Abs!

I've always wanted Rock Hard Abs! (I can't type Rock Hard Abs! without the caps and the exclamation point) but never really wanted to do anything to actually get Rock Hard Abs! I mean, it's too bad eating Tootsie Rolls won't get your Rock Hard Abs! becuase I'm really good at that. But sadly, in case you wanted to try the Tootsie Roll technique to getting Rock Hard Abs!, I'm here to say it doesn't work.

So I had Jason take before pictures. It's pretty sad. But I'm posting them because by the end of the summer I am going to be so ripped you're going to think I'm the host of the reality series Work Out! I'm sure Subway Jared wasn't happy with his before pics either.





I started doing ab exercises for myself, and then I borrowed 8 minute abs from Mrs. Breedorf, but my dvd player isn't connected - thanks to Jason dismantling it when he was trying to get to the Comcast DVR to throw it into a wall when he couldn't get it to stop fast-forwarding. Two words - anger management. So THEN I found these awesome ab workouts on that same DVR Jason tried to destory. Anyway, I should have Rock Hard Abs! in no time!

Six pack here I come!!