Summer of Rock Hard Abs!

Shortly after I learned I would not be pregnant this summer, I thought about all the things I could now do that I couldn't when I was briefly with child. The first thing I did - smoke a cigarette. I quit years ago when I found out I was pregnant with Charlie, and there are a lot of things I hate about smoking, like the fact it could kill me. And it makes my hair smell like a sticky-floored bar. But the best way to feel like you're doing something bad and getting away with it - smoke a cigarette. So I did. With a Venti Misto - all caff - from Starbucks. THEN I took a vicodin. Cuz I'm not much of a drinker.

It was a nice evening, in spite of learning that I was carrying around a dead fetus inside of me just hours prior. Sorry - it's crass but that's exactly what my mind was replaying in my head on constant repeat until I had the d&c. It's gross.

So anyway, I decided that I didn't want to continue with these only-when-not-pregnant activities because a) smoking in front of your 2 year old kills the fun of it - and, again, will kill me as well, eventually leaving Charlie motherless and devestated and alone, b) Venti anything makes me pee all day, c) vicodin gets in the way of, well, living. And pooping. It constipates you, you know.

So my next challenge was this: what could I do this summer that I couldn't do if I was pregnant AND that was good for me?

This led to a natural conclusion: The Summer of Rock Hard Abs!

I've always wanted Rock Hard Abs! (I can't type Rock Hard Abs! without the caps and the exclamation point) but never really wanted to do anything to actually get Rock Hard Abs! I mean, it's too bad eating Tootsie Rolls won't get your Rock Hard Abs! becuase I'm really good at that. But sadly, in case you wanted to try the Tootsie Roll technique to getting Rock Hard Abs!, I'm here to say it doesn't work.

So I had Jason take before pictures. It's pretty sad. But I'm posting them because by the end of the summer I am going to be so ripped you're going to think I'm the host of the reality series Work Out! I'm sure Subway Jared wasn't happy with his before pics either.





I started doing ab exercises for myself, and then I borrowed 8 minute abs from Mrs. Breedorf, but my dvd player isn't connected - thanks to Jason dismantling it when he was trying to get to the Comcast DVR to throw it into a wall when he couldn't get it to stop fast-forwarding. Two words - anger management. So THEN I found these awesome ab workouts on that same DVR Jason tried to destory. Anyway, I should have Rock Hard Abs! in no time!

Six pack here I come!!

Father's Day

When Jason and I started dating, I never thought about whether he would be a good father. Parenthood wasn't a thought then... I just knew I found the person I was looking for - the person that would share this life with me. I knew he was going to be a fabulous husband, but I just didn't think about his fatherhood potential just then.



After being married for a few years, we started talking about having children. He was certain of his desire to have kids. I was not. I was afraid I would fail or let them down somehow. So instead, we got a dog. This commitment was almost too overwhelming and I just about made him turn around and go home on the way to the breeder. He convinced me we would be great dog parents, and I told him if I could keep this dog alive and happy, we'll talk about having kids. Well, that was 6 years ago and Boo is still very much alive and very happy. He's snoring on the couch right now with his head and shoulder slumped over the armrest.



After a year of trying and missteps, we finally got pregnant with Charlie. I was terrified for the majority of the pregnancy that I had done something that I could not undo - and our little family of me, Jase and Boo was now going to be irrevocably changed by adding a fourth. Jason was calm and confident that this new addition would only add to the great thing we had going on, and not take it away.



Of course, he was right again. And now when I watch him with Charlie curled up on the couch, reading numbers aloud for the eight time in a five-minute span with patience and even a smile on his face, I know that I couldn't have picked a better man to be the father of my child.



Happy Father's Day, Jase. We all couldn't do this without you.

Flying with Bernie

Jason was at the airport last Friday morning, getting ready to board a flight to SoCal, when a number of crew personnel started running toward the gate.

This is never a good sign.

Those of you who know Jason probably know that he's not a great flyer. He's too nervous to take the xanax his doctor gave him because he's afraid that when the plane starts going down, his impulses won't be sharp enough to pull the plane out of its nosedive. So he white knuckles it, repeating the mantra, "Millions of people fly millions of miles every day."

Jason looked out the window and though his view was partially obstructed by the plane, he definitely saw the legs of a man who was lying face down on the tarmac. Again, never a good sign.

A team of people surrounded the man and one of them opened a suitcase that contained a defibrilator. Jason watched as they worked on him for about twenty minutes. Meanwhile, crew members were walking in and out of the area, crying. Some downright sobbing. They finally loaded him up into a vehicle and drove away. Slowly. Not a good sign at all.

Jason went up to this one guy at the gate and said, "Sorry, man. So who is that, a crew guy?" The guy looked at Jase and practically whispered, "No. It's the captain."

Yes. Jason's pilot died as he was making his final checks of the plane. As first class was loading.

He called me at 6:30am. I was asleep, so I was hot pissed until he told me that his pilot died. My thought then went to that guy's wife, and how she was getting a phone call right about the same time. Except it wasn't her husband saying his pilot died. It was some administrator saying her husband died.

He decided not to go that day. Even though I told him the odds of the second pilot dying would be very very slim and even if he did that's why they have co-pilots and it could have been worse - the pilot could have died in the air. But as I told him all this, I hoped he'd come home early as well. And when he came home, I was just a little bit nicer. I felt lucky - my husband came home.